Sunday, January 12, 1997, Back of the Book Your host assumes we're actually here, since no one has told us whether this program is still on the air or not. In related matters, the Deadly Cult of the Tocks Tap spent $62,000 in real, Uhmerican money last year in its attempt to destroy the electromagnetic spectrum through the use of lawyers. During this program Little Squishy, who's still not used to being real yet, discovers the Cult is challenging the laws of physics in court and may yet succeed in having some of them removed from the text books. Pope Weaselpenis XVI, aflush with his success in marketing the ChiaChrist last month, proposes the canonization of Tickle Me Elmo who, as a Saint, would grace the covers of various prayer books and holy pictures for free, while making the perverted Pontiff a potful of dough. Once this scheme is approved Elmo will be killed immediately. Free Form Live Radio by R. Paul Martin.(firstname.lastname@example.org)
Sunday, January 26, 1997, Back of the Book In a gastro-intestinal segment filmed while sailing the alimentary canal Itchy T. Echidna interviews Mr. Bilious T. Slugbladder, who always seems to bob to the surface, about his new fast food/fast buck emporium named Pukin' Great Greasy Stuff. After lastmonth's featured special of human kidney pie, this month's special is a concession to protesting vegetarians: Mashed potatoes made from real potato by products, also available are French Fries in bile, from a similar source. In an effort tocapitalize at both ends Mr. Slugbladder's salmonella salon offers a tasty after dinner mint called The Inflatulator, which is designed for those who are wind deficient. Free Form Live Radio by R. Paul Martin. (http://www.interport.net/~rpmartin)
Sunday, February 9, 1997, Back of the Book Mid-Winter day occurred less than a week ago, so we're slowly starting to getlight back into our lives. The most fun your host has had in the last three depressing months was consulting the Rand-McNally map of his ass. It's a part of the map maker's "Flabby, Old Places That Used to Look Good" series. Meanwhile, your host has been studying high finance. He's discovered the world of entrepreneurial wealth and has found one of those get rich quick schemes that can't possibly fail. In a brilliant move designed to cash in on the exercise craze that everyone but your host is going through he's decided to get in on the ground floor of a franchise that has the exclusive rights to a piece of sports equipment that everyone needs. Your host has sunk all his dough into volleyball racquets, and when they take off, so does he!Free Form Live Radio by R. Paul Martin. (email@example.com)
Sunday, February 23, 1997, Back of the Book Your host, who's been falling apart lately, realizes that in one month his 1994, Spring Offensive to find a significant other will be three years old. If he can find a fresh coat of paint and some breath mints he'll renew his plan and hope that Princess Charming will stumble across him and take him to her castle, love him forever and shower him with sex. Until then he's still practicing on his own. In a segment on the future of superstition, Pope Weaselpenis XVI debates Nun Oftheeabove, Abbess of the Sisters of Indulgent Funk, an order devoted to - well, no one's quite surebut they're very active. "Women in the Papacy" is the topic and the Abbess has brought with her a very sharp knife and the suggestion that gender can be such a changeable thing. Free Form Live Radio by R. Paul Martin. (http://www.interport.net/~rpmartin)
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